Dear Dr Tej: parents' questions answered
Parents ask honest questions about their child's learning, motivation and wellbeing. Dr Tej Samani, founder of Performance Learning, answers.
Why is my daughter underperforming in A Level Economics even though she’s totally capable?
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is that a capable A Level student who understands the content but scores poorly usually has an exam skills problem, not a knowl…
My daughter works so hard for her GCSEs but exam anxiety is ruining everything
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is that exam anxiety triggers a fight-or-flight response that temporarily blocks memory retrieval, so reassurance alone rarely …
My son, 16, is scared to leave school but won’t admit it – how do I support him?
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is that a 16-year-old who avoids college or apprenticeship applications is usually afraid, not lazy. School feels safe because …
My daughter is super bright but does the bare minimum at school – how can I motivate her?
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is that a bright child who does the bare minimum is rarely lazy. Coasting still earns a pass, and low effort can protect them f…
My child refuses to go to school and I have no idea why – help!
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is that school refusal is almost always a sign a child feels overwhelmed by something they cannot yet put into words, such as a…
My son failed his mock exams but is refusing help – what should I do?
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is to treat mock results as feedback, not fate, and to separate the grade from the child. A defensive teenager is often protect…
My child is always on their phone and I worry it’s rotting their brain
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is that constant phone use is a sign of habits, not a damaged brain, and attention can be rebuilt with patience and structure. …
My teen is constantly revising but keeps failing exams – what’s going wrong?
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is that a hard-working teen who freezes in exams is usually using revision strategies that build familiarity, not recall. Re-re…
My child shuts down whenever I ask about school – what can I do?
Dr Tej Samani’s advice is that a teenager who shuts down about school is usually struggling with how they feel, not what they can do. Parents should f…